The Magnificent Rose

October 28, 2013

The greatest love you can show is to give (lay down) your life for your friends… John 15:13

“Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8

The Magnificent Rose

He bought us with His precious Son, His beautiful Magnificent Rose…

My grandmother enjoyed a rose garden in the yard of her extremely modest home in Bosqueville, Texas. She was a short, round lovely woman; when she laughed, her eyes twinkled. Her life had been painful and tragic, but she had five children who adored her. She enjoyed necessities, without luxuries. As a child, I remember my father and his siblings building an indoor bathroom in her house…and she was appreciative, but her rose garden was probably her greatest joy! Her beautiful blue eyes were accentuated with her lavender bonnet she wore as she gardened. She wore short sleeve, floral cotton dresses and I remember her having scratches on her arms. I discovered that she loved to work on her rose bushes, feeding them and pruning them, but the thorns would literally tear the thin skin on her arms and leave her bleeding. However, beautiful and fragrant roses were produced in her little garden. I wondered why she would endure the pain of her endeavors, but to her, they were worth every effort, the pain and sacrifice she expended; her roses were her luxury…

A few years ago, I was asked to speak to a group of high school girls at a Christian school on the topic of “Godly Relationships.” I had been involved in their lives enough to know that they all adored roses…as most women do. I purchased a single pink rose for each one of them. Then as I prepared for the time that I would spend with them, I began to think about how roses and relationships have amazing similarities; caring for roses and caring for relationships are very similar.

How like a rose is a relationship,
fragrant petals in beauty reply.
But thorns to tear a tender heart
in pain the soul does cry.
But beauty is the victor,
while in grace and humility spent
All is gain, nee’r count the cost,
of God’s relationships.

Throughout history, the rose has been a symbol of love and the language of the rose has been spoken in various cultures for centuries, the message varying with each color of the rose. Medieval Christians believed that the five petals of the rose (naturally grown or wild roses typically have five petals) represented the five wounds of Christ and the red rose symbolized the ultimate sacrifice of His blood. And ultimately, our Christ Yeshua was crowned with thorns…instead of what He deserved as God’s Son…

Today, no one can question the beauty of the petals…the fragrance of a rose…

And no one can deny the bitterness of a wound from thorns…

The greatest love you can show is to give (lay down) your life for your friends… John 15:13 (Freely transfer the possession of something present, provide with, allow, permit, supply with; Lay down- surrender/to give up)

I have a dear friend in Waco who is the founder and president of a non-profit organization called Elegant Ladies Haven. It is dedicated to touching and changing lives of marginalized women, assisting them in becoming self-sufficient (God sufficient) and independent. The Haven offers goal setting, parenting skills, food handling and gardening skills. The clients are held accountable for behavior and are given various responsibilities in order to participate in the programs. Minister Linda Majors believes in giving them a hand up, not a hand out! …She has a house which she is preparing to use for her outreach center for people in her community. In front of the little house, she has planted beautiful rose bushes and they bloom brilliantly. After a visit with her a few years ago, she handed me one of the beautiful coral roses. Linda cares for and prunes her roses…just as she cares for and sometimes has to exercise tough love with her clients in the ministry. The thorns often scratch and tear her arms…And as she cares for her clients, they often scratch and tear at her heart…and such beauty comes into the lives of her ladies…and into Linda’s life as she loves and lays down her life… and it is worth the sacrifice…

And our Faithful God, continues to bring broken lives into the Elegant Ladies Haven…Linda does not count the cost…they are worth the sacrifice…They are precious to God; they are precious to her.

I think about the relationship between parents and children; until the child is grown, no child can understand the magnitude of the sacrifice, the tough love, until the child becomes a parent; then the perspective and revelation comes…There are thorns that tear at the heart of the parent during the process…There are thorns that tear at the heart of a child. Often words spoken in anger are some of the most painful offenses in the lives of families, often more difficult to forgive than some actions… But the beautiful bloom of love is more powerful than the pain… the rose of love blooms through forgiveness…Love is worth the sacrifice!

I think about the relationship between a bride and her groom…each one must be fed and pruned…and the work often tears at each heart…but the bloom of the petals of love, like the rose, is beautiful and fragrant…and worth the sacrifice…

My parents were married for forty-two years and many of those years were tumultuous. However, my father was deeply committed to caring for my mother every day of her life, even after the diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis, ten years into their marriage. Their relationship was like the work, and the feeding and the pruning of the most brutal thorny stems of a rose bush…but the roses finally bloomed after forgiveness occurred during my father’s battle with leukemia. They did not give up… their marriage was worth their sacrifice…

And I think of the beautiful and sacrificial love of our Christ Yeshua. His perfect life was given as an offering for each one of us…He literally endured the brutal tear of the wicked thorns in order that we would experience the beauty of an eternal relationship with our Loving Heavenly Father through His blood…He did the work, He made the sacrifice… for our hearts and our lives….through His atoning Life blood…and in the heart of our loving and forgiving God…it was worth His Son’s sacrifice, The Ultimate Sacrifice…

The Magnificent Rose…
His precious blood spilled on the ground…
The thorns had torn His heart…
His life was crushed and shattered there…
But the veil was torn apart…
So that we could come before our God,
Our lives, He lovingly chose…
He bought us with His precious Son…
His beautiful, Magnificent Rose…

Therein lies the beauty…

The ultimate model for the relationships which God has placed in our lives, is the example of Christ Yeshua…

He surrendered His life…His will…His breath…to the Hand of His Father…for the sake of His friends…for you and for me.

Some years ago, I became deeply convicted of my thoughts and of how often I took offense at other people. I listened to a sermon by one of our pastors, Mark Wible, at Highland Baptist in Waco and he brilliantly shared the message that not one of us had the right to pick up an offense…Our Lord modeled this…He refused to be offended by us or by His accusers, by His executioners, not by the bystanders…He refused to be offended. He modeled the epitome of Grace and Forgiveness…and the Lord impressed this on my heart through the message of this pastor. It was life-changing…

I began to remember a game that I played in childhood…Hot Potato…As children gathered around in a circle, a ball was thrown by someone as they said, “Hot potato” and it would land in someone’s unsuspecting hands and their job was to throw it to someone quickly as they repeated “Hot potato” and threw to the next surprised person. I began to play that game with offenses. When someone hurt my feelings or my pride…I would get rid of it like a hot potato, and instead of throwing it to someone, I would just throw it to God, knowing that Jesus would dispose of it for me and for the person who had offended! As I became more consistent in my responses, I found a freedom that I had never known…because Jesus had modeled and lived it, so that I could follow Him, through His grace…

Love…”does not keep a record of wrongs…” 1 Corinthians 13:5

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Colossians 3:13

Forgiveness and Grace…

When our children were young, teaching forgiveness was a huge challenge. I recall a time when one of their friends had been mean and had deeply offended one of them. We were able to talk about the offense and how important it was to forgive the person. That night during bedtime prayers, our child said to God,

“God, please forgive my friend for being so mean to me and help me to not make him mad so that he will not be mean to everyone.” Amen

I clearly saw that we had some work to do…

When one of our children was hurt or offended by a friend, we encouraged them to pray for that person; and we were amazed to watch as God worked in the hearts of everyone involved because He is the God who keeps His promises and works miracles. Our Mighty Loving God is in the business of restoring relationships…Forgiveness…

My little grandmother with the blue eyes and the scratched arms and the beautiful roses, had a reason not to smile at the world. She had been judged and she had been deserted by a husband and a family…leaving her as a single mother with five children to survive during the depression years. I have no idea how she survived, but by the grace of a Loving God, she raised her five children, and she smiled and she loved…and she gave to others out of her poverty…

My father had the words engraved on her memorial stone,

“A twinkle in her eye, a loving smile, outstretched arms to all in need.”

She forgave. She never let her circumstances and her challenges determine how she would love and how she would live…she forgave the world. She took no offenses. She left a legacy for her family, for me.

Relationships are like beautiful roses…as we do the work, feed them, prune them, and survive the thorns…we can enjoy and embrace the beauty of the rose, of the relationship that our faithful God has appointed and ordained.

“Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8

My friend Minister Linda forgives. Often the ladies whom she lives to assist make unwise choices, sometimes at Linda’s expense. She is firm, she is tough, she is loving…Consequences follow, but unconditional love is demonstrated within the doors of her ministry and the walls of her heart as she loves and forgives…

My father-in-law, Paul J. Meyer was a prolific speaker, writer, and entrepreneur. I believe that one of his greatest contributions to his friends, family, community, and the world was a book that he wrote entitled, Forgiveness…the Ultimate Miracle. The book has been read by thousands of people and without a doubt, there have been countless stories of lives changed because they were encouraged to embrace forgiveness in a relationship or forgiveness of themselves. In the book, Paul shares this wisdom, “By forgiving, we remove the distance and walls that are between us.” Yes, the walls and distance which undermine relationships come tumbling down…not easily, not without determination, not without prayer…but through the miracle of forgiveness!

Humility and Service

When I was a teen-ager, I spent the night with one of my best friends. We awoke on a Saturday morning to a knock on my friend’s bedroom door. Her mom came into the bedroom carrying a tray filled with delicious breakfast treats and fresh orange juice. I was astounded! Her mom smiled and said, “Enjoy your morning girls…I love ya’ll”, as she left the room and pulled the door closed.

That incident remained in my memory and in fact influenced me to make a life-decision about the way that I would entertain people in my home and about the way I approached relationships in my life. No, I do not serve breakfast in bed every day, but I made a decision to treat every single person who enters my home in a loving hospitable way…even those who live there. Yes, there were chores and responsibilities for children, but several times a day, I tried to serve them in some way, the same way that I would serve my guests. I also would make the concerted effort to bless my husband in the same way. And it was the most fun way to live! When I fail in this task, I ask God to get me back on track to the mission that I believe that He has given me. Why should I treat those whom I love the most any other way? I also remind myself that Christ is always a guest in my home…and as I serve my earthly guests…I know I serve my Loving Master, Christ Yeshua.

Our Lord and our Master washed the feet of His disciples…If you have attended a foot-washing service you know… I can attest to the fact that it is incredibly humbling to allow someone to take my sweaty feet and to wash them gently, as the Lord did His friends’ feet. My first reaction was to say, no let me serve you and wash your feet…and that was the reaction of the disciples…and when He touched them to demonstrate to them how they were called to live…to endure the thorns for the sake of relationships with people whom God adores…and with His touch, they were never the same…

Herein lies the pain…therein lies the beauty.

Holidays are approaching and for many people, they are some of the most difficult times of year. Broken relationships become even more alienated and healthy relationships can be strained. The thorns become even more prickly…causing hurt and deep chasms in families. Words and actions become offenses in the most painful ways…

I pray that we each remember the love and the sacrifice of Christ Yeshua as we follow His model…I pray that we can toss the offenses away before we even take hold of them…I pray that we can serve those who offend us as we serve our Lord…The Magnificent Rose…

May we serve as Christ serves… Serving when the body cries out, I am too tired…May we give as Christ gives… Giving when you want to save it for yourself…May we forgive as Christ forgives… Forgiving when you think that you cannot…May we love as Christ loves… Loving when the heart cries out, I have been offended…

Enduring the thorns…and embracing the beauty of relationships.

How like a rose is a relationship…

“Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8

All is gain, nee’r count the cost,
of God’s relationships.

Abundant joy,